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I dreamed…

8 Nov

You had me at “hinged mouth.”

1 Jul

Always expect the unexpected.

14 Oct

This is some sort of advertisement, but that fact is unimportant. Unimportant to me, that is, not to those who hoped it would make them money. Whoops, people who thought this would make you money! I am way too apathetic to go to the site mentioned at the end (www.blackthinking.com). The important thing is that it features flies and a guy in a suit, and someone would probably call it “surreal.” Let’s not be too hasty with the throwing of adjectives like “surreal” about, especially when we really mean “weird” or “unconventional,” ok? It’s surrealish at best, but you know what I mean. It’s also fairly good… so watch it.

Via Neatorama.

Oooo Meth: Side effects include cleaner home.

29 Jul

Oh Office of National Drug Control Policy, you’re so silly. Epic fail on making meth look bad enough. Apart from the itchy wounds (which I already have, natch – Eczema anyone?) and the hallucinations, meth looks pretty handy. The house could really use a clean-up! Via Videogum.

The light is your true friend.

7 Jul

I hate commercials, but not because they’re interrupting my precious television shows or something. No, I usually hate those, too. The reason that I hate commercials is that they have the potential to be amazing, and they fail. I like short things (that’s not what she said [note to self: not funny]): short films, short stories, shortcakes. They don’t mess around with mindless expositions and they tend to be wacky. Wacky is good. When a commercial is first-class, my hundredth viewing of the Jon & Kate Plus 8 marathon is brightened for but 30 seconds, and that’s much more than no seconds, which is what it is like when commercials are bad. Like always. Don’t people go to school for this advertising thing? Is no one creative anymore? My point: if only all commercials could be as good as this one from Thailand (via BuzzFeed), I would still be alive right now. Because I wouldn’t have killed myself thanks to the fact that my life is so sad.

Now every day can be boozeday!

6 Jul

To commemorate the first time in 75 years that we Coloradoans can buy booze on God’s Day, I present you Zach Galifianakis’ Absolut Vodka commercial.

Unfortunately, I did not celebrate by visiting a liquor store today. Fortunately, I am celebrating by drinking the vodka I already had. Cheers!